~~EV..care my body and weather's temperature .

 

只有我用心做好每一件事情，上帝一定会照顾我的。

 

 

我会好好爱自己，这样我才有能力以后好好爱我“将来的家庭”，慢慢来，幸福一定是掌握在我手里的，就算别人没法给我100%--至少我可以给自己很大一部分（不能只是等待别人给予的，那样会很累）。

 

等我明年搬到我新家的时候，我一定要买一张最大最舒服的床。。。我可以好好的美美的睡觉。。最近我对自己越来越好了。。很喜欢买一些我喜欢我认为漂亮的高跟鞋放在鞋架里任意选择。。买一些我认为很舒服的很干净但是又很有品位的衣服和香水。。。我现在认为衣服，鞋子，包包不一定要多。。但是一定是质量舒服看起来又有taste的东西。。。世界上没有人会对自己永远的好（除了自己亲人）。。但是我自己可以对自己永远的好。。就如一位名人女士所说的：“女人长的漂亮还不如活的漂亮，但是如果你长的漂亮还活的漂亮，那你就是最幸运的女人，所以所有的女人都希望自己是第2类型的女人，我也希望全天下的女人都那样，包括我自己，就算不是也要让自己向那个方向发展的，只要你心是那样想的，事情就会那样发生”

 

 

我的一个韩国朋友在我之前低迷的时候。。他发了一条短信给我：Life is really short to complaint..just enjoy!...我看了感觉：对的，我必须得让自己成为一个很理智和冷静的人（不以物喜，不以己悲，就算不能全做到，但是也要尽量做到）。。。特别是今天我更加感悟到了（今天我看到了一些让我舒服的东西）：

 

今天我们公司的一个client 请gery和我去吃lunch，因为他们company的帐是gery做的。。为了感谢我们同时也是为了以后我们更加小心留意他们公司的帐，所以请我们吃饭（这是我认为他们约我们的真正原因）。。他们约我们去了一家townhall比较优雅的日本餐厅（这里的服务员也都是一些20岁左右比较漂亮的日本女孩，因为我有特意看了一下她们，心里想：这个女的长的还可以）。。。去到这家日本餐厅，gery 指着那个方向说：那个是maiko！他们做在靠窗的地方。我很意外我以为只有maiko一个人约我们。后来我发现还有多了一个很优雅的鬼婆，当我慢慢靠近的坐下的时候，这个鬼婆很快就给我一张很优雅的感觉。。而她老公也是典型的鬼佬那种绅士的人，他们很配。。。。他们的优雅也会让我很特意注意自己应该怎样让自己怎么去和他们沟通了。。maiko和gery在谈和解释着他们公司的帐和他们想趁这个机会好好问问他们怎样让公司可以避一些税。。而我和这个鬼婆（sorry,我忘记她叫什么名字咯）静静的听着。。我们笑了笑和静静的小聊了一下。。原来真的在我估计之中。。。原来他们两公婆都有自己的business，他们独立经营的business，鬼婆她有自己的business同时她还是一个designer（所以我感觉她有一种气质，一种优雅和高贵的气质，其实老的鬼婆很多都是很有气质的，特别是那种英国鬼，反而年轻的鬼婆很多都是给人感觉比较放荡）。。。当我在问这个优雅鬼婆的时候：我问他们俩公婆是不是一起做business？她轻轻的而又有力的大方的回答我说：we do own business，but we still a couple！然后她微笑了一下。。。简简单单的一句话。。已经我已经深刻把西方婚姻文化体现在里面：她的意思是她们是一对很相爱的夫妻，但是他们又是相对独立的，他们虽然是夫妻但是他们有着他们自己喜欢的工作和生意，他们又是独立的。有人说鬼佬的婚姻是相对自私的，对的我很认同，所以我排斥找鬼佬做老公(但是也许有一天 I will change my mind)。但是这样不代表我说西方文化的婚姻就一定不好的，只是我是个传统的中国女人所以我不接受但是我是认同他们的，因为从某种角度来讲：西方文化下的对女性更fair。而不像传统文化下的女性必须可能做到贤妻良母的形象（等结婚了，大多数家庭还是有点男权主义，女人还是要贤妻良母可能比一些女强人更吃香，如果说一下女人天生就是喜欢做贤妻良母，那她刚刚好了也不用埋怨慢慢享福，但是世界上却有一部分女人，她们比较喜欢工作多余做家务--这部分女人也许就是女强人的倾向人物了。如果这部分女强人没有遇到对的男人或者遇到大男人主义的人，估计这些女强人在传统文化下会被这些大男人主义的男的认为：她们不会是一个好妻子。。很悲哀：这些女强人性格的女性为了婚姻，她们也许会克制自己的想法，为了以后自己的家庭，压抑和克制自己的想法，为了提供更多的机会给她的老公，为了成全以后这个幸福的家庭。）。。。从这个角度：我是更欣赏和羡慕西方文化下的女性，她们相对的更有机会去发展自己的想法，为自己再为被人而活！而传统文化下的女性，等结婚 了以后是为了家庭活再为自己活！其实每个文化都有自己好和不好的一面，我想我可以做到的就是：尽可能的融合两个文化的精华，把好的想法用到自己的身上，为了自己以后的人生走的，更快乐，更幸福和更有层次，我给自己定了一条路就是：我会尽量的为了我的家庭去付出，但是都是自己还是要独立，那样我才会自己的快乐，我不想为了一个家庭变成黄脸婆完全为了别人而活，但是我也不能太自私至少我要为了我的家庭为了我的亲人而活，从中庸角度出发，以前的自己还是太不够成熟还是没有到底想结婚的地步，所以为了自己活了很长一段时间，现在的我应该是时候是为了家庭和为了自己而活了）

 

听了这个鬼婆的这几句话，我心里静静的联系到了以上这些心理活动。他们这对couple看起来还是挺幸福的，两个人有自己的business同时他们都是做他们自己喜欢的生意，还有他们有一个儿子和女儿。听起来和看起来还是蛮幸福的。老公看起来绅士大方，女的看起来优雅高贵。女人有一个毛病，当你看到一个比自己年龄大的女人，如果你觉的她是你要向往的类型的时候，就会静静的留意她一下：看她穿什么衣服，带怎样的项链，用什么包包，用什么香水。。等等？而我对这个old lady。。我就有静静的和她交谈和留意了她。。。衣服我看了一下，只能说舒服而有品位的。。而就显眼的就是她带的一块简单精致的表：OMEGA的（我很惊讶也和舒服，因为我带的和她一样OMEGA的表）。。至少我在她身上从形式上可以看到一样的东西我很开心。。我得承认自己有一些虚荣，我觉得某些东西必须要买名牌的才会更有品味，但是不是那种什么都是买名牌，偶尔没有品味的为了名牌而买一堆的人，也许是叫俗，所以要适度的有些名牌效应，但是不要过度。。。但是从不可以触摸到的东西：人品，外貌，气质，前途。。。这些是自己要去定义的。。。这些东西是不可能拿来比较的，但是我是对自己有信心的。。我对自己很有信心的人，我觉得自己什么都不欠缺，我甚至比一般人多了一份幸运（这是我对自己的定义），我很讨厌别人把其她的女的和我去比，虽然我不是最好的人，但是我从也不会认为自己是差的或者是比谁差，就算是我在心里会去认识的，但是也不希望是从别人口里说出来，世界比自己的好的女人太多太多了，但是我相信如果你真正爱一个人的时候，你一定会认为他或她就是最好的就算他或她本来就是很一般的，如果那样一直比下去，世界还会有真爱，还会有永恒的爱嘛。。我相信会有的，因为我就是其中的一个，会把爱情转换成为亲人的爱的人，世界大部分的人是永远都会爱自己的亲人的。

 

今天另外一件事情让我很开心，就是我忽然有了一个idea就是：我希望我可以把我上班的电脑搬到我的working parter gery（也算是我的工作老师吧）办公室，希望可以和他呆在同一个office里，因为那样一来我有什么问题可以立马请教他，2 来那样上班就更有趣，那样工作更有效率，他有什么东西要我做或者我有什么问题，我们就不用来回跑，那样工作不是更有效率，我进步不是更快了嘛。。。我对我这个想法很满意，然后就情不自禁的赶快给gery打电话，告诉我的想法给他听。。他听了以后：good on u，非常赞同，we ask NIZAR for helping us tomorrow！。。。accountant是一个无趣的工作，但是我想从这个无趣的工作中寻找乐趣，一种上进但是又快乐的事情。很幸运，我遇到了很好的工作伙伴们，我们一起去吃lunch，一起去做auditing，一起去见客户，什么有什么问题随时都可以请教有accountant长辈。

 

很期待明天的到来：因为我们公司的一个大客户ESCADA的accountant manager Allan 请gery和我一起去：“ying cai”联络感情。ESCADA是一个famous的名牌德国公司。。所以喜欢找帮它们做帐的人联络感情，希望在帐可以留些感情和关心，不希望多了和少 了一个0.。。。我很开心我喜欢去“饮茶”。。但是gery同事他说很害怕吃什么鸡脚，什么肠的。。呵呵。。我想明天要order我喜欢的鸡脚嘛@@?。。明天我会见到又是怎样类型的人呢，好像明天是个香港人@@？

 

事物都是慢慢发展的。。相信自己只要保持平静和美丽的心灵去进行，我们都会得到美丽的人生，就算偶尔出现错乱但是也是短暂的，那只是考念我们的意志，希望让我们对未来更有免疫力。。。就好像我现在这样，在我某方面最低迷的时候，但是同时又是我另一方面最顺利的时候。

 

   relax..happiness...life..where i am enjoying.............^^!   i do not know how to express......just so ..enjoy my life....not pressure...not hurry ..not sad...just feel good good... 

                          i believe my friends, my family and me will going more and more better....

 

                              .............................la la la .....o o o ......good good .....la la la ......good good .......xixi

 

 

   It is long time to entre this space...reason it is too busy......my study (accounting ) is going to graduate.  recently i working in accounting company (i think i already study this subject and spend much money &time ,i should get some behoof from it ....since sep 2007 the migration law change it is better working accounting ...In one day my one HK good  friend introduce this accounting job to me ....so i working busy now..)

 

    But i have not enjoyed this job now....it is boring(every day face to face  the  number and computer (it is really  lot of number about aome company banking deposit , debit...bank cheque ...calcalate GST...income.....and ..so ...on..).....one thing is really make me madness that it is often the balance  is not "O" ...it means  i ready typed some falseness figure to the company acconting record....it face so many ..so many ...figure how can i makesure i can it exactness....anyway ...i should make the balance become zero....so i need to check up all the figure and information again...sometime will check few time cos the balance only over or less 1.21  or 0.36......in that time ,i really hate this job.....which is not worse one....there are some more worse...for example i meet the situate one day......there are following is MR che and I conversation:

 

                             nico(I):  Mr Che i ready check up the number and information , i don think so there still have problem...and i don know the balance still have problem (the balance still over 589.12)

 

                             MR.Che:  OK...let me check it ...so..he sit down ...i stand and looking at him how he can check it....he first time like me check all the information ....the result same with me ...no figure problem.....He stop and thinkover short time ....then he said ...it have aother method check it....he make all the figure change format and become 2 digit to  7 digit...

                               e.g 12.3000000   

                                   589.12

                                   256.5600000

                                     45.9800000

                                                                                                               .

      mr che show me these figure which after he chenge format . he ask me "nico what did u find it ?"    

                        

                      nico: i said " all the figure become 7 digit ...why 589.12 still 2 digit mr che?( i rhetorical question to him )

 

                     Mr Che: cos 589.12 is not a number...

     

                          nico: why ?it is a number ..why u said it is not a number?(i realy don understand and little bit crazy cos i don think this is easy job make me pressure ..i want relax job don need to think about too much...it is better for me i do my business i am a boss)

 

                         Mr Che:he explain why it is a number may be someone type this number press another keyboard in the computer and make tis number's fomat different with another...and the computer did not calculate this number to the total....so we can use the way to check up it

 

                         nico: i said :"o o " and then i   record this situation and method to my notes (which record some complex process  )

 

  It another interesting thing : the boss's son also work p/t there and next to me ..the office all made from the glass and window...so every staff can see each other.. the boss' son often listen music , watch movie and sleep ..something that ..and i keep work hard  i think i am so poor become the slave for this job ( only for me some time i also will go shoping in the luch time,cos office in the city sussex st.)

 

        this job only make me most happyness is the boss let me work any time i want (if i have time i can work more.. if i busy i don need to work ...working time rely on i decide).....cos my friend tell him i still a student and just go to for p/t. so he don give me too much pressure...i think the main reason the company did think i am important for them only a learn ..

                                                                              

 

                              

 

     

                      

  

  Holiday is coming....i really feel so so ..happly....i had stay at school 5 weeks from 12 am to 8 or 9 pm......really feel very tired and boring..!!!!!  The reason this term i study most difficult one subject( corporate accounting)...i alway feel i will sick(sometimes i got fever, sometimes i got cold..sometimes.....i just think i was going to die during 5 weeks prepare for exam)....i  am geting free now and i don feel sick....^^!!!!!!

 

  i never feel relax and free like now.....i am throwing study away from my brain....i just like holiday.....enjoy holiday...and hope all my classmates and me  can pass exam and get good result....

 

 i am preparing for ielts exam .......but i will take it easy^^ ......

   

  about 40  munites we arrive the his house....we stand at the sea and opposite the isle...i said where ur house @@?" his piont to the isle and tell me "in this isle ,we need to drive this boat go to the house"....i look at the isle ...there are almost 300 house around the sea in this isle ...every house owner has theyself boat and drive these boats go to home....i said to Ted .."why u buy this house ...it is so trouble..need to drive boat go home"....he said ...it is so enjoy..drive the boat and look at the beautifwl sea view ..not every day do that just weekend "...i answer ..i cann understant==...too trouble for me"....

 

after lunch ..Ted take me walk byway where between the long reef beach and golf ground.....i look at the left side is long reef beach where many people walk on the beach and some people s  in the sea...i said "why these people don feel cold!!!"  On the right hand side is golf ground where many people play golf....my friend introduct the beach history and teach me how to play the golf at the same time.... about why call long reef beach cos in 1889 many boat hit the reef in the night time and many boat and people drop in the sea...about the golf i have not paly before....i know form my friend tell me ...it is alway hit the ball ...see the ground where have mark that let u know how many meter they will have the hole ...there have many different colour mark in the ground...the blue one for the guy ..and the red one for the woman ..cos the man's power is strong than the woman==....there r many stream and high-low hill that want to add the difficult level for play the golf in the golf ground .....on most interesting thing is ...we saw a bird lay egg in the golf ground...the bird find that we look at it ..it very anger and howl us ....i very scared cos this little bird look very anger and howl us ...before i see the birds very scared the human...but australian bird don scare the human.." my friend tell me this bird don want to us hurt his baby and ask we go "..so i quick go ..little bird stop howl us....

 

...........**..........                                                                                          .........**............

                 if one day , i become demon......

                                   babe ..will u still love me ........

                                                    cos i suddently have a thinking ......

                  i want to become a demon.............around with u ...........

                                 when i thinking u ...............

                                            i just want to greedy hug u all the time........

                                                                              

                     reason is i am a demon ............want to wind around u ............

                                          let u cann far from me ........................

                                                 i will envy &anger.... 

                                                     when u talk about other girl.....

                                                            i need to the best one for u ...........

                  my friend said me so overbearing...........

                                  yes , i am ...........

                                  anyway.....

                   if i really become a demon...

..............**..............                                                                                 ............**..........

                                           .